Ask a retired person what they did on Tuesday and watch them enjoy not having an answer. "Retired: My Only Deadline Is Bedtime" is the whole schedule, printed on a white label.
The Signature White version, poured with 60+ hours of Bamboo Forest. Office send-offs, a card that needed backup, the friend who got out first: this is the one.
Why You'll Love It
- "Retired: My Only Deadline Is Bedtime" — quoted in full on the Signature White label
- Signature White on clear glass, which suits a pale kitchen or a bright shelf
- 100% soy wax — plant based, clean and even, with no petroleum wax
- Non-toxic and phthalate free — vegan, cruelty free and non-GMO
- Bamboo Forest — green bamboo, cypress and cedar, fresh without being sharp
- 60+ hours from a 13.5 oz jar, carrying well past the first month off
- Hand poured in small batches in Minnetonka, Minnesota — made in the USA
Perfect Gift For
Office send-offs, retirement drinks, an early exit, a friend who retired years before you will, a leaving card, a downsized house, and whoever now describes 9am as the middle of the morning.
Product Details
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Material: 100% Soy Wax, Essential and Premium Fragrance Oils, Cotton Wick, Reusable Jar
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Size: 13.5 oz Jar | 3.375" x 4.25" 60+ Hours
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Attributes: Phthalate Free, Non-Toxic, Cruelty Free, Vegan, Non-GMO
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Origin: Hand Poured in Minnetonka, MN, Made in USA
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Care: Trim the wick to 1/4" before each burn
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Item: SW-2136-12
Scent
12. Bamboo Forest - Bamboo, Cypress & Cedar
Frequently Asked Questions
Q: What is a funny retirement gift that is not a joke about being old?
A: Age jokes land badly at a send-off, and freedom jokes almost never do, because the person is genuinely pleased about the freedom. Aim at the schedule rather than the birthday.
Q: Does a candle suit somebody who has just downsized to a smaller place?
A: A single jar suits a smaller home particularly well, since one candle reaches a whole apartment and takes up no storage. Shorter burns are usually enough in a compact space.
Q: How is the white version different from the natural one?
A: Same wax, same scent, same 60+ hours — it is a printed white label on clear glass instead of natural brown paper. It is entirely a question of which suits their room.
Q: Is a green woody scent a safe choice for a gift?
A: Green and woody scents divide people much less than sweet or floral ones, which makes them the sensible choice when you are guessing. Bamboo and cedar sit comfortably in any room of a house.
Q: How should this be stored if I buy it early?
A: Keep it upright, out of sunlight and away from a radiator, and it will be exactly as it is now in six months. Heat is the only thing that damages soy on a shelf.
Q: How long should each burn be?
A: Three to four hours is the sweet spot — long enough for an even melt pool, short enough that the wick does not need trimming mid-burn. Very long burns overheat the glass.
